Retro television graphics: just can't get enough

(The 1974 ITC Entertainment ident: "probably about as scary as you can get without causing fatal injury". Description from KRS Logos, image via TV-Ark.org.uk)

Turns out I wasn't the only kid who was mildly--and sometimes not-so-mildly--creeped out and fascinated by those choppy animated production company tags that bumpered the television reruns of my 70's/80's youth. This brilliant post at Metafilter has inspired about five days of surfing for retro "idents" ("closing logos" in US parlance) and half-remembered theme music. KRS Logos is an impressive compilation of text descriptions with some great twists--a "scare factor" rating (it's comforting to know that large portions of your generation were unnerved by the old Viacom "V of Doom" ) and insider-chic nicknames. The odious yellow-and-red mid-60s Screen Gems "S" animation has earned some titles that made me laugh out loud.

But Ident Surf 2005 has led me into some bummer territory, too. A morbid desire to see the Scariest British Ident Ever in action brought me to this page at TV-Ark.org; a trip through the Cult TV section made me wish I'd spent a couple of growing-up years watching the telly in England, just as an eye-opener. I mean, really. Sky--which I'm ashamed to say I'd never heard of until last night--sounds like the most intriguingly eerie live-action "children's" show in history, with minimal kitsch and lots of Stonehengian mystery. The descriptions alone make me ache for a DVD release. (Compare this to what we in the US were getting at about the same time, and ponder the difference...)

On a lighter note, one of the links in the original Metafilter post leads to The Color Television Revolution , a splendid labor of love site with a low key, retro web design and some very cool clips and info. The color presentation logos section was the hook, but the most memorable artifact here is this sweet 50s animated commercial for RCA color TV sets, which features a diabolically simple, "Sugar Shack"-esque jingle that you will not be able to get out of your head for days. Trust me on this. You've been warned!

Christine Keeler and Jeff Gannon: do not disturb the sexy*

(Christine Keeler, c. 1963. Photo by Lewis Morley.)

Call me naive--most people do--but I'm convinced that the typical American on the streets is far less politically-obsessed than cable news, talk radio or the internet(s) would have us believe. The average self-proclaimed "conservative" probably isn't in favor of eliminating all taxes and repealing child labor laws; the average self-proclaimed "liberal" is unlikely to support the forced conversion of every Wal-Mart into an green organic co-op. (At least, this is the average on my street; your street may vary.)

However, I'd bet my house on the average American being a tiny bit sexually-obsessed, especially when the sex involves a side dish of political intrigue. Scandals involving gorgeous young nobodies and powerful corrupt politicians are as old as Caesar, but the Profumo affair of 1963 remains the most stylish one of recent times. How many sex scandals generate photography worthy of the Victoria and Albert Museum? The semi-young nobody (Jeff? Jim?) at the center of the current American contretemps posed for a few nudes that are, shall we say, a little less likely to make the curator's cut. As usual, retro is better.

A look at the past also shows that in the end, the gorgeous young nobodies tend to return to nobody-dom, either by choice (as in Miss Keeler's case), or by virtue of public fatigue. The media attention inevitably shifts to the corruption itself--possible spying, allegations of illegal propaganda, security lapses, lying under oath and the like. Absent a bit of soul searching and a graceful retreat from the limelight, the sexy-person-du-jour almost always becomes 1) a "beleaguered victim of bad publicity", 2) a "survivor", 3) an "aspiring celebrity" and--if they haven't wised up and gone the "graceful retreat" route by then-- 4) a "potential housemate on The Surreal Life ". Yikes.

How predictable is this slippery slope? It's time for a pop (culture) quiz:

Jeff, Monica or Christine?

All of the quotes below can be attributed to either "Jeff Gannon", Monica Lewinsky or Christine Keeler. A few are too easy (Christine Keeler would be unlikely to speak about the White House), and some have ellipses to replace giveaway nouns and pronouns. Answers can be found in the comments section below (pops up.) No fair Googling. Have fun!

1."...I'm hoping that fair-minded people will stand up and say that what's been done to me is wrong...[w]hy should my past prevent me from having a future?"

2. "Even a criminal has the right to a new life..."

3. "I didn't know it was a crime in Washington for people -- for you to want people to like you and so I was friendly. And I guess I wasn't supposed to be."

4. "But what was -- what's been done to me is far in excess of what has ever been done to any other...that I could remember. My life has been turned inside out and upside down."

5. "...I thought it was probably appropriate to align myself with the President's side, being that that's whose side I was on and there was no question in my mind."

6. "Discretion is the polite word for hypocrisy."

7. "No one else knows the whole story. I was there. I lived through it…[if] I don’t tell it all now, the story in the history books will always be imperfect and that would be wrong.

8. "I've always been a date-oriented person and I had a--probably a habit of circling dates...when I either talked to the President or saw him."

9. "I have probably one page for each day at the White House, about 200 pages of stuff. Is it all interesting? Probably not. But it could be [a book]."

A book. Sigh. Everything old really is new again.

* Allow me to be the last to use this tired, aged meme. On the off chance you don't recognize this silly phrase, click here. (I think we missed one swingin' shindig...darn it.)

Wagglepop Auctions: a short, strange trip

(Off topic? Maybe, maybe not. This might have been a cool place to snag some retro goodies, if only...well, read on.)

Ironically, there's plenty of success to be had in the field of chronicling failures--especially if you're chronicling them online. Jump the Shark has been around since before I got my first PC, and while the laden-with-schadenfreude "joys" of F'dCompany.com wore thin long before the dot-com boom went bust, the site is still hanging in there. But the short, strange saga of Wagglepop (which ended with a bang yesterday) has to be a record, even in the age of blink-and-you'll-miss-it business news.

The start-up online auction site had everything going for it--a charismatic founder with plenty of eBay sales experience and some tech know-how, a catchy/quirky name (not everyone liked it, but who could forget it?), and absolutely perfect timing. In the wake of eBay's latest fee increases, zillions of sellers were eager to cheer on an alternative venue, and Wagglepop had a thriving "popper" culture of its own even before its prelaunch last week. There were Wagglepop mentions in the Wall Street Journal and in USA Today, Wagglepop webrings, Wagglepop specialty template designers, and cute Wagglepop fan items.

So how did it end up blown to smithereens in a little over a week? Incredibly, the whole Wagglepop story--from "I hope it does as well as eBay or Google" to "I wonder if there are grounds for a class action lawsuit?"--is chronicled in one long thread at the Online Traders Web Alliance (OTWA) message board. It runs for 87 pages as of this writing, but the drama begins on page 2, and it never lets up. Someday, years from now, business students will be handed printouts of this thread as a cautionary tale.

In the meantime, one frustrated exPopper has listed a "commemorative" non-fan item at--you guessed it--eBay.

Groovy times: how this blog came to be

I really do love the sixties--and the early seventies, and the late fifties...

This blog is written for those who share my fascination (some would say obsession) with the decade-or-so that gave us all manner of memorable goodies, from the controversially sublime to the intriguingly ridiculous. Starting up a full-blown sixties site in 2005 would be like trying to revive EJ Korvette in the age of Wal-Mart; there are some stellar well-established retro sites in the sidebar that do the big-site thing brilliantly. (Some of those are very comprehensive--pack a lunch!) This'll be more of an overview of miscellaneous vintage bits you might have missed out on--or forgotten about-- along with some fun finds from my semi-fabulous thrift shopping, attic-searching, estate-sale-attending, box-digging forays.

Enjoy!